true story.

A: "are you afraid of snakes?"

me: "no. why?"

A: "well i saw one the other day. over where we take kentson to go to the bathroom. and i was just wondering if you would've been scared."

me: "i mean, i wouldn't have screamed. but i would've gotten kentson away from it fast. what kind of snake was it? an anaconda {cue smart tone}"

A: "well, it kind of looked like a pet snake."

me: "what makes you say that?"

A: "it didn't look threatening."

me: "it didn't look threatening? a snake? so that makes it a pet snake? was there anything else that made you think it was a pet snake?"

A: "yeah. it was tan and green."

by this point, i was literally crying with laughter.